The past couple of weeks I have been so busy. The more I became overwhelmed with “to-dos” the more I delayed getting started. I procrastinated. I guess you could say I felt similar to a deer standing in the headlights of a Mac-daddy truck — frozen.
Last week, I had so many responsibilities and things to do, I wanted to jump off what seemed like a roller coaster and take a break. A nice slow, leisurely ride on the ferris wheel would have been nice.
With several meetings to attend, assignments at work due, a house that needed cleaning, several loads of laundry waiting to be washed, a painting project, an ill friend who needed assistance, a project due for a board I serve on and songs to memorize for an upcoming recording, I felt like I’d never get to read the book I’ve been hoping to break open. More than time with the book, I longed for time with my family. Have you ever been so busy, you missed the family members you live with? That’s how I felt last week.
Living on a farm, there is always something that needs to be done, fixed, fed or doctored. Sometimes I look at my swimming pool and wish I had more time to enjoy it instead of just cleaning it.
This summer my son has been to three camps. Between the packing and unpacking and shuffling of schedules, we began a renovation project. Finalizing the plans with the architect came to and end about the time a 30- foot dumpster was delivered in my yard, a back hoe, a bobcat and another commercial piece of equipment I don’t know the name of. When the demolition began, the nervous jitters did too. The reality of tearing down to rebuild can create an uneasiness — especially when you wonder just how much this is going to cost when it’s finished.
When Wednesday came, it was 5:30 p.m. before I knew it. Church? Did I really feel like going? The answer was no. Since my son had a football practice at 6 p.m. I didn’t have to set a good example by going just this once, I thought. Not going seemed OK for the moment. Since I was so tired I began to justify not going.
I sent a text message to a couple of friends to see if they were going. If they weren’t than it’d be easier for me to go on home. I could use the time to complete a much needed chore or finish a project, but more than anything I had taking a nap on my mind.
When one of my girlfriends said she was going and wanted me to go. I hesitated in responding. It wasn’t until my husband sent the text message, “Church tonight?” that I came to the realization it’s where I needed to be going. How could I tell my friend and my husband I was planning on finding a quiet place to catch up on some Z’s?
Not too long after Bible study began, I found myself slowing down. The Scriptures we were discussing and the ones in my notebook were soothing away some of my tension. I was reminded by a verse which keeps coming back to me — in different settings either by word or through song. “Be still and know that I am God.” The root of “be still” means to “let go.” Let go and let God to be exact!
By the end of Bible study, I was feeling better. I needed the reminder to “let go” and stop trying to do it all. As I mature as a Christian I am seeing how I can’t do it all. The faster life moves, the more I have to do. When my “to do” list grows, so does the stress level. It’s then I need to willingly bring it all to God, to “be still” and “let go.” It’s not about being perfect and getting everything done, its about getting “almost” everything done. It’s about putting God first, family second and all the things on the “to-do” list afterwards. After some still and quiet time with God, there is a renewing and refreshing that comes — sort of like a second wind. With that, and the grace of God, things will eventually get done.
Take some comfort in John 14:27, “I am leaving you with a gift — peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.”